Tom's Author Notes for Ruth Ditch Prologue - Ch. 3

Study questions for your holiday reading:

• How do you feel about the Prologue? Would you prefer that the novel started with Chapter 1?
• Before Ruth is introduced in Chapter 1, does the opening of the chapter feel message oriented, ironic, a mixture, too soon to say? Would you prefer that the novel started with Ruth’s introduction in Chapter 1, i.e. no prologue and no opening Chapter 1 sequence at the memorial?
• Do you think there is too much dialogue driving the action, especially in the first two chapters?
• Does it feel plodding at any point? Does it take too long for the “story” to start? Would you like to see indicators of where the story is heading sooner
• Any glaring POV issues?
• There is violence in this story, no getting around that. But I recognize that some people are put off by it regardless of context. If it’s possible to put aside any reader bias, does the physical violence ever seem gratuitous or not serving anything larger in the story?
• If more flashbacks to Ruth’s early life are used intermittently to shed light on the present, would that bother you?
• Anything else on your minds is welcome. 

Thanks for reading.

Allergy List

We all received this info in an email, but I thought I would also post it here for reference.  That way it's easy to return to if we have questions.

Also, we have all been working around Karen's allergies quite deliciously so far, but since most of us aren't used to doing so I thought I might ask Karen to provide a few favorite recipe ideas at some point?  I am determined to bake something eventually.  Are there any gluten-free, nut-free, vegan cookie/muffin recipes out there?

Karen says:

As you know I am very allergic - EpiPen level, kryptonite- could result in death- type allergic. I also have celiac disease. Let me underline that it's fully possible to work around this and that it very rarely goes wrong, but it requires I pester you guys with the following alarming information:

There are three layers to this –

1. The stuff I can't be in the room with - this goes for peanuts and loose nuts (and large amounts of very stinky cheeses.) It's to do with the dust and smells that spread in the air and can give me an asthma attack. Also, the dust from loose nuts on people's hands gets everywhere and means I'm likely to have a non-mortal but very unpleasant allergic reaction from touching surfaces like doorknobs etc that the nut eaters have touched or from giving one a hug at the end of the night. 

 2. The second layer is that I can’t be in a room/small apartment where some allergens have been recently heated or cooked. This goes for eggs, nuts and dairy (i.e. scrambled eggs, steamed or boiling milk, the baking of delicious egg-milk-nut-cake.) If there is ventilation, doors to keep closed to the cooking area and/or a few hours between me and the cooking, it's fine. 

3. The third layer is what I personally can't eat, list follows:

Allergies: 

All milk products (milk protein, so that includes lactose free products)

Eggs

All nuts, including almonds, pine nuts, and particularly peanuts

Soy

Sesame seeds

Gluten (all kinds of flour and grain except corn, potato, rice, quinoa, and special gluten free oats.)

Turkey 

Flavor enhancers (msg)

Strawberries

Honey

Raw core fruits such as cherries, nectarines, peaches, apples and pears.

(other fruit like banana, oranges and grapes are fine)

Typical dangerous ingredient listings include "spices", "Natural flavor", "seasonings", casein, malt vinegar etc. I also avoid "may contain traces of:" nuts, peanuts, eggs and dairy.

Spice mixes, sauces and mustards etc without a detailed ingredient list can contain allergens.

As tiny and invisible amounts are enough to trigger allergic reactions:  hands,  knives, pan and cutting boards have to be thoroughly washed if they've touched any allergens.

For frying etc coconut, olive, rape seed, corn or sunflower oil are fine.

All pure spices and herbs are fine, all vegetables are fine, also fish and meat (except turkey), potatoes, coconut and rice are fine. :-)

This means I can eat salads with only vegetables in them and many other delicious things. It does mean however, that it can be challenging to cook for me. Which is why you always see me with lunch boxes and I usually eat what I bring myself. I will absolutely not hold it against anyone if they don't feel up to cooking for me. Don't worry about it.

It means as long as you don't cook the eggs/cakes/etc in the venue right before the meeting, you guys can eat anything except loose nuts and very stinky cheeses as long as you wash your hands at some point during the night (not usually a problem) and hug me a little carefully.

Thanks for reading this and please don’t hesitate for a second to call or email with any questions! 

Karen 

347.603.2053. karenhavelin@gmail.com

Madeline's Author Comments on Saint Sebastian

So I think you guys can mostly intuit what I'm looking for in terms of feedback.  I'm looking to start sending this out soonish and want to know how it reads as a whole, whether the beginning (which I have heavily edited) flows smoothly and whether the ending fits and feels complete (or not).  I've also received the comment that the writing isn't direct/lewd enough for fourteen year old boys.  I'm not sure what to do about this since lewd wasn't at all what I was going for in terms of tone, but I'm interested to hear your opinions.

I would love line edits (which I understand is easier for those people with actual copies than it is for those without), but if you're not feeling it I understand.

Thanks! xoxo

Karen's Author Comments

Dear workshop,

Several of you have read some of these stories in slightly different incarnations. In general I need to know how this works as a whole novel-like thing, and as one and the same main character.

Also, of course how they work as discrete stories, but they’ve all been workshopped before separately. Line notes are welcome if you feel up to it, or you could just make small notes of what you’re thinking at different times, if you miss certain information at specific times or start to fade, etc. Or refrain if you prefer.

Organizing principles, whether they work and suggestions for better solutions.

Unified themes, are they there or do they need to be strengthened? The titles are new, what do you think?

My goal is that they should work as separate stories and have some variation in style and mood between them (also want your thoughts on this) but that they should deepen each other, resonate and layer in a meaningful way, particularly when read in the right order.

The first story in particular is a work in progress and contains elements I’m not sure about, but I really really hope this reads like the main chunks of a very novel-like unified collection.

Thanks for reading, can’t wait to hear what you think!

           

Scott Dievendorf's Author Comments

For the first 70 pages of Time As Weather (working title).

Feel free to treat it as you please. 

Since this is such a new project, I don't necessarily have a complete handle on it. I don't have it totally planned (though the ending is written and many major points are accounted for in notes). 

My main concern is if it's working, interesting, worth continuing, or even plausible (as a novel, not the premise). 

Don't worry about line edits, since this is a nascent stage of the book.

I would like feedback on sections—chapter by chapter—as well as the whole, particularly what's not working, what's plain foolish, or what's inconsistent. Basic workshop stuff.

Ongoing Discussion Thread

This particular post can be used as a general forum to add comments, thoughts, or updates that aren't related to any central thread or aren't significant enough for their own space. That way we can avoid numerous emails and have all past remarks amassed in a central location.

I labeled this "Discussion" so that, to return to it, one simply needs to click the "Discussion" link on the right (as far as I can tell—I'm still new to the blogger interface). 

Kevin Magruder's Author Comments

For The Indefinition of Acton Ramirez, Kevin says:

I guess I would appreciate line edits/margin comments but I also wouldn't want people to get too bogged down with them.

What is of most concern to me are the following:

1) Pacing and transitions, especially throughout the middle chapters (3-6).

2) Ideas and themes - how are they working, or not? Am I laying it on

too thick in places? Any recurring ideas/themes just completely

unclear/frustrating?

3) The overall consistency of tone (or lack thereof) throughout - both

chapter to chapter and especially with regard to the final chapter.

Does the last chapter resonate tonally with the rest of the novel? Is

it functioning as a final chapter?

4) Transitions again, especially between paragraphs and chapters.

5) Descriptions of actions vs. descriptions of setting - is more or

less needed in either category?

6) Interiority/intimacy of the narrator in some places vs. what might

be described as a detached tone in others. Is this noticeable? Is it a

problem?

7) General weaknesses - major or minor

8) Any other concerns

Basic Group Information

This will be our tentative workshop plan for those interested in attending regularly or those that would like to pick it up in the future.

Time
We'll be meeting twice a month. For the sake of variety, we've scheduled a different day for each session. That way if you can't make Sundays, for example, you'll still be able to participate.
The second Friday evening of the month (6pm), and the fourth Sunday at noon (12pm).
I'll put together a basic spreadsheet of the schedule and share it either through google docs or some other means.
The first workshop meeting will be Friday October 12. The second will be Sunday October 26 and so on.

Format
-We want this to be an informal setting. Altogether we'll meet for 4 hours, but only 3 of those will be dedicated to workshop proper. On Fridays the first hour will be for a potluck dinner and on Sundays a potluck brunch.
-Festivities hour: This hour will allow us all to break the ice and get out any friendly chit chat that might otherwise interrupt the workshop. The host is responsible for providing alcohol only (two bottles of wine or equivalent should suffice). The guests must bring enough food for all in attendance. Please alert everyone if you have any allergies so that we don't inadvertently poison you.
-Each meeting will be at a different person's house, depending on who volunteers. Ideally, everyone will host once. A list of the meeting places will be included in the schedule, and adjusted accordingly. The first meeting will be at Scott's apartment. The second will be at Madeline's.
-In order to maintain the informal environment, but to keep on track, we'll follow a host-facilitator model. Whomever's hosting will be responsible for keeping track of time, getting the workshop started, and reorienting the conversation if it gets off topic. This will be a liberal role that's mostly in place to keep things organized.
-The workshop itself will revolve around the author's requests. When the author submits, she/he must include a brief outline of what she/he would or wouldn't like from the workshop. For example, if Kevin is submitting a novel, he'll state, "I'd like the conversation to be about the novel as a whole. Please avoid specific details in the chapters, and don't worry about line edits."
-Given this, the author will also have the freedom to direct the conversation if she/he feels it's being unhelpful. This will provide her/him with a co-host role. The host will intervene if the author is monopolizing the conversation, being argumentative/defensive, or gets off track. The author may also communicate to the group what she/he would like out of that session.
-The page limit will be variable, but will share a relationship with the number of people submitting. For example, if someone wants to submit a completed novel, she/he will be the only one submitting that session. If someone is scheduled to submit with 2 others, the page limit should be reasonable given the bulk of reading. The schedule and submissions will be tailored to the needs of the group. The length should really be determined by common courtesy. It should also anticipate which date one will sign up for.

Remote Workshopping
-It's incredibly important to us that we establish a means of remote workshopping so that people living outside of NYC can participate regularly.
-This will mostly be worked out based on trial and error. Our first effort is going to be with Skype or Google+ video conferencing. We'll reserve a seat in the room and place a computer there as a stand-in for the disembodied workshopper. The success of this will depend on internet connectivity, microphone capability, whether the video is clear enough, and whether the speech is crisp.
-If we find out science has disappointed us, we may need to opt for emailed comments or some other similar method. We can work that out as a group.
-In our utopian vision, we think it would also be nice to do a workshop field trip of sorts. Meaning, one session we head up to Ithaca so that Yardenne might host and, therefore, be present for the workshop. Similarly, other towns workshoppers might be residing in. Like I said, trial and error.

Blog
-Madeline has created this online space for us to meet and converse when not in the same room. We all agreed that email chains are incredibly annoying and hard to keep track of.
-The blog will provide an open forum for conversation and comment. It will also have the schedule and other important information (like this list or some variation of it).

The First Workshop
-As mentioned, the first meeting will be Friday October 12th, at 6pm at Scott's house.  Email or leave a comment for address and/or directions.
-Kevin, who will be unable to attend due to Germany, will be submitting his novel (we'll have a few hard copies, but it will mostly be an electronic submission).
-We'll workshop the novel the following meeting on Sunday October 26 12pm at Madeline's house (she'll provide the address).
-In addition to receiving Kevin's manuscript, we will eat, drink, and hang out, but most importantly, we'll make a schedule for people to sign up for submission dates.
-We'll also try to configure remote workshopping. So out of town folks, please let us know how to reach you at that time, whether through skype or what have you.

We are putting together a phone number roster, which will be hopefully available to everyone (privately) soon.  If you intend to join the group at a later date, please also give some heads up before the meeting so we can have food for you.